Just Another Manic Tuesday: So, Who Stole Our Streets?

I promised to write about Philly musings so here goes.

At approximately 8 a.m. (US EST) on Friday, June 1st, the quiet neighborhood of UC/WP (University City/West Philly) was rocked by a massive heist that took place right under our very schnozes. What was this "massive heist" you ask? Did someone's house get burgled? Was someone's car broken into for the fine, dorm-quality blanket that was lying on the backseat just taunting, ney, entrapping, the casual car-vandal/passerby? Well, that wouldn't be "massive" now, would it? I'm speaking of our streets. Yes, our streets have been stolen. How, preythee good madame or sire, you ask politely, is it possible to steal streets. Well, here's how! The Streets Division of the City of Philadelphia came about two weeks ago and took away the old street surface on our block. Generally speaking, even I am not addled enough (at least, not yet) to equate that innocent, municipal act with theft. However, when the city contractors didn't return with a newly repaved and resurfaced, gleaming asphalt street, which we've already paid for, the civilized term in common English parlance for such an act is -- theft. Mayor Street, we want our street back, and if this is just a misunderstanding and you simply borrowed the street (I have to admit, ours was particularly lovely with its irresistible, moon-like craters), no worries, I'm setting up an account where you can direct the interest payments. I have to warn you, though -- I charge near-usurious rates.